im frustrated....

The city of Kochi will soon be overrun with small bridges. Confused? Well a drive through the lakes (more than 1 lakh on last count) formed on the beautifully cut, copy and pasted roads of the city, will warrant a need for them, before someone drowns in its apathy. Meetings, discussions, promises, contracts…the list of solutions and possibilities to this unending problem of man- made lakes on Kochi’s roads over the last 8 months is still to take wings. A suitable solution to this would be to rope in the services of PETA. Just imagine the number of insects such as ants being drowned in the tidal waves on the road, whenever a passerby or a vehicle travels through them. Entire colonies are being destroyed. Their sources of food are getting soggy. And with incessant rain and bad roads keeping the people away from shopping, there is not much for these insects within residential homes as well. PETA needs to be addressed about this serious famine and death issues so they can bring in their sniffer dogs, all chained in heavy lock and key, for evidence linking the deaths of these insects to the unfortunate rains battering the city’s well constructed roads. Of course, there could be a revolt from the mosquitoes and other superbugs, not to forget jaundice and common cold virus. They are having a ball for months now and would like to keep the party going forever. PETA being their parent organisation will have to listen to their needs as well. In this tug of war, between animal rights for ants and those thriving bugs, PETA would almost surely slip out and leave the matters in the hands of our corporation, lest they be accused of step-motherly treatment. After all, our councillors have ‘promised’ changes in the ‘coming’ days, they’ll say. Still we got a slim chance they may say yes and protest for better roads for the sake of the poor little ants if not for us humans, at the same time creating a pool of waste water elsewhere for the bugs to grow.

Another solution would be to invite the ISRO to come test their moon probes on the huge craters formed on the city’s roads. They could test for adaptability and ruggedness and even create shock absorbers for the same simulating our roads. The only problem would be whether these probes will find the city’s roads worse than the underdeveloped moon surface and claim for damages. For countering that, our hardworking councillors could be sent on a historic one- way voyage to study the terrain of Moon and decide the safety factor for ISRO’s probes. One- way cause the Malayalee in them will build a city and level the moon’s surface and of all things start a tea shop there as well. So why return to the craters of Kochi. And why return with empty promises.

crush...?anyone!!!

Now...ive been a guy who falls in love very fast...my close frnd akhil calls it as the butterfly effect....he says i can change from a caterpillar to a butterfly in a day's time and keep flyin from one flower to another until i find the right one. Though i've not been in many steady relation, i have always enjoyed my one sided experiences. Now this pretty girl in my school, used to keep me blue eyed at the age of 9. I kno i was too young, but cmon it was just a crush. My eyes wud follow her everywher...but like every crush of mine in the later years, this one too died fast...she was lookin at anotehr guy in class...and was askin me on tips to fine tune him...I had to be content being her brother....Even today....when i think of tat incident..i realise girls who smile a lot at you...half the time wud be doin so so that they can get favours done out of u.For guys who think a girl smilin at them is a sign of true love-beware.....u cud be her next big brother....

religion...

Now ive been an agnost for the better part of my life, only having changed my views recently. I always found it hard to understand the rituals associated with the church and the constant chanting of prayers. My mother once said i ought to have been born as a Buddhist, since their prayers involves just turning the scrolls on a pillar. The person who almost always influenced me in such matters of faith was a very close family friend, Asmi. She and her twin sister, Arya were my bro's age and they were our closest family friends in Delhi.  I was closer to asmi, for the main reason that she was more approachable. She used to fill my head with ideas about the One God and why worshipping idols was a waste of time. I used to stare in wonder at this girl of just 9 who would talk like she had just deciphered the reason for wars post 2000. Now, these twins were peculiar. Arya was tall and athletic; Asmi was graceful and petite. Asmi due to her small size was almost always targeted by bullies in the colony who would throw stones at her, hurting her in the process. Just so, she felt our side of the lane safer and would take me out on the cycle for her theology classes. Amen!!

next morn...

The sun was glorious the next day as i was finally even. When small and for some now even now, there's a feeling that the world moves only when we are present. A particular lane, a street or even parts of a city come alive as we walk through it. The remaining times they just remain still.Like statues. I too felt like that when i used to go on my long walks through the colony to the house of one of my sardar frnd who was as animated as mickey mouse on seeing me, like someone had just pushed the ON button behind him. Diwali was nearing and for the people of delhi diwali means spending a year's savings on one night of fireworks. It was always about who had the largest number of fireworks. Some of my rich frnds used to buy it for more than a lakh and that was 15 years back. Imagine today!!They would burn only a quarter of it and the rest would be given as charity to kids like me who celebrated diwali on a smaller scale and whose parents had some sense not to burn off hard earned money. The view of the delhi night sky during diwali is astounding. There's no night sky!!!Just white clouds and the smell of burned paper. Now celebrations here begin a fortnight before the festival with kids burning firecrackers throughout the day. This animated frnd of mine and his group of frnds used to be in the park always playing with the masala or powder inside the crackers and burning those too. when i reached his home noone was to be found. I later came to know he was in the ICY with only a chance he would regain his eyesight. The masala he was trying to burn had not lighted properly. when he went to check on it closely, it suddenly burst into his eyes. His eyes had been burned. But like they say, the spirit of Diwali remains with the brave. His face had patches and black spots everywhere but miraculously though his eyes were covered for 2 weeks, he regained his eyesight completely. But with that incident, my parents started buying me more crackers, afraid i would also start burning the masala if there wasn't enough of the original stuff for me to burn. Diwali had just found a new client.!!!

just desserts...

That week was hell for me...i was punched and beaten in all wwf matches....But they say with every bad day, ur good days add up. The setting was perfect-the small hall in our house. Mom away at work, a lonely evening, me and my brother playing cricket in tat tiny space, with a tennis ball and a bat bigger than us. As usual, i had been forced to ball to him while he batted. You could say ive never loved damage to property more than the one which just happened..I bowled slow, my bro swung the bat and whack!!! the tube shattered in the main hall.Ha...for the first time my bro had realised his days over me were numbered. We hurriedly picked up the broken pieces and cleared the waste. Half an hour later, like the commissioner, my mom came in. My bro as usual sat glued in front of the tv, though this time round, it was my fav channel playin...Mom walked thru the hall, switched on the fan, switched on the light...................................aaaaaaahhhhhhh((((((( the thot tat jus went thru my bros mind must have been sumthin like this))))))))).....and as she turned round, i realised even my secret wuld be discovered today. A double whammy awaited us.....

contd new..

Hindi, the dreaded language of we southies was more like gibberish script to me with a line on top. I used to always wonder why the top line was needed and i hated the way certain alphabets in it seemed same. Like ba and bha.Ka and kha. ta and tha. My hindi teacher had a tough time negotiating with me. But like they say, any language you don kno, ur sure to know the swear words it contains. So was it for me. Swearing in school and home while playing, hindi or for that any matter is grasped in this down to 'earth' manner. While at school, i was once reprimanded by my teacher for not doing my homework. She couldnt understand that none in my family were expert enough in hindi for me to do my work the perfect way she wanted. What followed was insult and humiliation. She made me go to my bro's clas, bring him out from ther(don forget he was the star among teachers back then too) and she insulted me in front of my whole class, with my bro by my side, tellin me to be more studious and smart like him. Obviously my bro didnt quite think the scolding was fair  and stood embarrassed as well. My repulsion for hindi and its teachers began from tat day...And my bro got the tool to blackmail me into losing the next few matches of our wwf fight-by threatening to tellin my mom, if i failed to allow him to throw me around on the bed and try out the stunts shown on tv......lol.wwf was really ingrained into us...

contd...again..after delay

The park in my first colony in delhi....aahh..the thought of it brings back memories of my dad buying me cricket bats month after month....the swings which i could never swing beyond 1 metre high, the rolling gates and the large number of wayward lazy trees leaving only a tiny piece of land free- which we called as our cricketing pitch. it was here that we used to converge every evening to try our hand at dodging the trees and hitting the boundaries. We could hit anywhere, due to the trees we were sure no one could catch our shot. Those evenings of bliss used to be interrupted by a wide variety of starry eyed stray dogs; salivating, red eyed and smelling. It was on such an evening that the trio of us reached the ground early. since no one else had reached by then, we decided to teach the dogs a lesson, to beware of human.....kids..?Ha. It was fun throwing small stones at them, making faces and staring into their eyes( something which we regretted and kept as a lesson for the rest of life). There were 5 dogs; big and rabied...what followed was pandemonium as we were chased by those 5 dogs throughout the park, with each of them intent on ripping us apart . After a few runs of being chased and fearing for my life, i noticed my valiant bro sitting atop the gate( how he climbed up i have no idea) and my tag partner ,abou ( the valiant stead?)outside while i was the bait for 5 hungry dogs........I ran, ran, ran and finally the 2 of them threw stones at the dogs and helped me to safety. Respect for animals comes easily once u see their dark side. It was then i realised i would be an utter waste being an army man...i would run away the minute a few hungry enemy troops came behind me...I guessed i was meant for internal stuff....-wwf on the bed..not on the field...